the draft rough

(an excerpt from a weathered receipt in my wallet)
i'm done with make-believe
i'm pushing buttons
the neutron bombs, halogen lights
the neutral wrongs of living
my life. call me up on
the radiation detector, it's too late
i'm referring to your childhood
trauma

i've contracted what seems to be a sinus infection---coughing, ear pain, headache right around my right eye

i'm also grown accustomed to life again, which results in feeling bland, ok with not do anything, and avoiding trying to make things better---now i know why i was so unhappy this summer; outside of routine, i feel awful, sleep-deprived, and the pain of my body killing itself, of me
sad i know, but only because i'm happy, and i need to maintain the balance---without depression, without sadness, would there really be change? without feeling bad about things, would we ever try to change?

also, going camping
and i sent in two short stories to zoetrope-all story
hazaa